Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls

Quotes: « Ace: That's quite a wrap you're wearing! Perhaps I could get you some fluffy new slippers made from the heads of innocent and defenseless baby seals! » « Skinny Husband: Who is this ghastly man? » « Ace: Ace Ventura, pet detective. And YOU must be the Monopoly guy! Hey. » [whispering] « Ace: Thanks for the free parking. » « Pompous woman: Another ACTIVIST, McGuire. » « Skinny Husband: Activist, yes. » [snobby laugh] « Ace: [imitating him] Activist, yes, mhmhmhmhmhmhmhmhm! » « Pompous woman: Mr. Ventura, there is nothing wrong with enjoying the fruits of nature. You should try it sometime. » « Ace: Alrighty then! » [smacks man in the face which knocks him unconscious, drapes him over his shoulders and begins to sing and dance exotically] « Ace: [shakes man] Do not pass go! Do not collect $200! » [hands back man to pompous woman] « Ace: It's lovely, but I fancy myself an autumn! » « Ace: That's what you slipped in! That's what was on your shoe! And that explains the abrasion on your palm! Let me run that back for you. » [backs up] « Ace: Malp ruoy no noisarba eht snialpxe taht dna eohs ruoy no saw tahw staht ni deppils uoy tahw staht. » [starts moving forward again] « Ace: That's what you slipped in! That's what was on your shoe! AND THAT EXPLAINS THE ABRASION ON YOUR PALM! DAMN I'M GOOD! » « Fulton Greenwall: My name is Fulton Greenwall, and I am looking for an Ace Ventura. » « Ashram Monk: No man here carries with him a label. » « Fulton Greenwall: Oh yes, no names. How silly of me. Well, um, he's an American. » « Ashram Monk: We are all children of the same life force. » « Fulton Greenwall: Yes of course we are. » [thinks] « Fulton Greenwall: He bends over and speaks from his rear. » « Ashram Monk: Oh him. Right this way… »