Python

Quotes: « King Arthur: I am your king. » « Woman: Well, I didn't vote for you. » « King Arthur: You don't vote for kings. » « Woman: Well how'd you become king then? » [Angelic music plays…] « King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king. » « Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony. » « Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see. » « Sir Lancelot: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I am not afraid. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your name? » « Sir Lancelot: My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest? » « Sir Lancelot: To seek the Holy Grail. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your favourite colour? » « Sir Lancelot: Blue. » « Bridgekeeper: Go on. Off you go. » « Sir Lancelot: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much. » « Sir Robin: That's easy. » « Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see. » « Sir Robin: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I'm not afraid. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your name? » « Sir Robin: Sir Robin of Camelot. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest? » « Sir Robin: To seek the Holy Grail. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is the capital of Assyria? » [pause] « Sir Robin: I don't know that. » [he is thrown over the edge into the volcano] « Sir Robin: Auuuuuuuugh. » « Bridgekeeper: Stop. What… is your name? » « Galahad: Sir Galahad of Camelot. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest? » « Galahad: I seek the Grail. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your favourite colour? » « Galahad: Blue. No, yel… » [he is also thrown over the edge] « Galahad: auuuuuuuugh. » « Bridgekeeper: Hee hee heh. Stop. What… is your name? » « King Arthur: It is 'Arthur', King of the Britons. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest? » « King Arthur: To seek the Holy Grail. » « Bridgekeeper: What… is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow? » « King Arthur: What do you mean? An African or European swallow? » « Bridgekeeper: Huh? I… I don't know that. » [he is thrown over] « Bridgekeeper: Auuuuuuuugh. » « Sir Bedevere: How do know so much about swallows? » « King Arthur: Well, you have to know these things when you're a king, you know. » « Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she's a witch? » « Peasant 3: Well, she turned me into a newt! » « Sir Bedevere: A newt? » « Peasant 3: [meekly after a long pause] … I got better. » « Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway! »